Ready-to-use conversation scripts for the conversations that matter
Copy, customize, and use these scripts to start difficult conversations with confidence
Use at clinic visits to normalize routine testing
"I'm here for my routine sexual health check-up. I like to get a full panel every [3/6] months to stay on top of my Awareness layer."
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Use when you want comprehensive testing without justifying your sex life
"I'm sexually active and I want to be proactive about my health. Can we run a comprehensive STI screen, including HIV, syphilis, gonorrhea, and chlamydia?"
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Use to establish baseline without disclosing status
"I value having a clear health baseline so I can make informed choices with my partners."
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Use when initiating discussion about safer sex practices
"I care about both of us staying healthy and feeling good. I want to talk about using condoms because protection is how I show respect for myself and you. Can we discuss what that looks like for us?"
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Use before sexual contact to discuss testing history
"I've been tested and I'm comfortable sharing my status with you. What's your comfort level with sharing about testing? There's no judgment here—it's just something that matters to me."
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Use immediately if barrier method fails
"Hey, I want to let you know a condom broke. I'm not freaking out, but I want to talk about next steps. We can look into testing, and if needed, there are other options like PEP. Let's stay calm and figure this out together."
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Use at emergency or urgent care after potential HIV exposure
"I had a potential exposure to HIV [X] hours ago due to a barrier failure. I need to start the PEP protocol immediately while I'm still in the 72-hour window."
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Use at ER or urgent care when seeking immediate PEP
"I am here for emergency post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP). Every hour counts for efficacy, so I need to see a provider as soon as possible."
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Use during intimate moments
"How does this feel for you? Is there anything you want to change, slow down, or try differently? I want us both to feel amazing."
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Use to establish non-negotiable boundaries
"I really value you and what we have together. There's something I want to be clear about: I'm not comfortable with [specific thing]. This is important to me, and I hope you can respect it."
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Use when proposing new activities
"I've been thinking about something I'd like to try. Would you be interested in exploring [activity]? I think we'd both enjoy it, but only if you're genuinely interested. What do you think?"
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Use early in a new relationship
"I want to have an honest conversation about what kind of relationship we both want. Are we exclusive to each other, or are we open to exploring? This is something I want to agree on together."
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Use to discuss pregnancy planning/contingencies
"I want to talk about what would happen if a barrier method failed or birth control didn't work. What would you want to do? I think it's better to know this before anything happens."
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Use to share relevant sexual or relational history
"I want to be fully honest with you because I care about our connection. I want to tell you about [past experience] because it might affect how I communicate or what I'm comfortable with."
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Use to normalize ongoing testing
"I want us both to stay healthy and confident. I test regularly—about every [3-6 months]. I'd love to get tested together, or at least know that we're both staying on top of it. It makes me feel closer to you, knowing we're being responsible."
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Use after unprotected encounter or barrier failure
"Something happened that might have put me at risk. I'm getting tested right away, and I wanted to let you know so we can both get checked if needed. This doesn't change how I feel about you—I just want to make sure we're both safe."
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Use to disclose a positive diagnosis
"I got some news about my testing. I have [STI/HIV status]. I want to be upfront with you: this doesn't define me, and I'm managing it. Let's talk about what this means for us, for protection, and for what comes next."
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Use when disclosing sexual orientation or gender identity
"I want to share something important about who I am. I'm [gender identity/sexuality]. This has always been true about me, and I'm sharing it with you because I trust you and I want to be fully myself with you."
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Use to establish boundaries related to trauma
"There's something in my past that affects me sometimes during sex. I don't need to go into all the details, but I want you to know that [trigger/boundary]. If this comes up, I might need to pause, and I'd appreciate your patience and support."
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Use when disclosing PrEP use or HIV status
"I want to be honest with you: I'm on PrEP/I have HIV. The science is clear—it's [undetectable/prevention]. I'm undetectable/protected, and I'm happy to answer any questions. Here are some resources if you want to learn more."
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Use to open conversation about PrEP with healthcare provider
"I am sexually active and I want to be proactive about my health. I'm interested in starting PrEP as a Medical Shield against HIV."
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Use to explore different PrEP delivery methods
"I've been looking at the PrEP Menu. Can we discuss whether the daily pill or a long-acting injectable like Apretude would be a better fit for my habits?"
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Use to establish baseline before starting PrEP
"I want to establish a clear health baseline before I start. Can we run the necessary labs, including an HIV test and a full STI panel?"
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Use to request advance Doxy-PEP prescription
"I want to add an extra layer of protection against bacterial STIs. Can you provide an advance prescription for Doxy-PEP to keep in my Safety Kit for use after sex?"
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Use to discuss specific Doxy-PEP dosing and timing
"I've read the 2024 CDC guidelines regarding Doxy-PEP. Can we discuss how I should use a 200mg dose of doxycycline within the 72-hour window if a barrier fails?"
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Use to understand comprehensive testing with Doxy-PEP use
"I understand Doxy-PEP reduces the risk of syphilis and chlamydia by about 70%. What other follow-up testing should I include in my routine if I use this tool?"
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Use to check vaccination status for sexual health
"I want to make sure my Health Armor is complete. Am I up to date on my HPV, Hepatitis B, and Mpox vaccines?"
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Use during HIV care visits to affirm U=U status
"My goal is to stay undetectable and untransmittable. Let's look at my recent labs to make sure my treatment is acting as a 100% transmission block."
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Use to discuss medication adherence and side effects
"I'm committed to my ART regimen, but I've had some trouble with [side effects/reminders]. Can we look at my Habits to ensure my shield stays strong?"
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Use to redirect provider focus to evidence-based care
"I'm not here for a moral lecture; I'm here for evidence-based healthcare so I can stay Fearless and Protected."
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Use to refocus visit on clinical data
"I value having a clear health baseline so I can make informed choices. Can we focus on the specific labs for my Awareness layer?"
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Use to reframe sexual health as neutral health data
"I view my status as data, not a judgment. My goal is to use the best toolkit available for my life right now, whether that is PrEP or ART."
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Use to establish boundaries about non-judgmental care
"I'm sexually active and I want to be proactive about my health. I'm looking for a No Judgment Zone where we can discuss prevention layers like Doxy-PEP or vaccines."
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Use when provider is not aligned with your needs
"It seems like we have different views on how to approach my sexual health. I will find a provider who aligns with my commitment to self-respect and informed choices."
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Use as affirmation of your care rights
"I'm not here for a moral lecture; I'm here for evidence-based healthcare so I can stay Fearless and Protected."
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Use as reminder of provider accountability
"The doctor's job is to help, not to judge. If this isn't a No Judgment Zone, I will find a provider who respects my agency."
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Use to affirm your informed decision-making
"I approach my sexual health as an act of self-respect. I've done my research on Combination Prevention, and these tools are part of my personalized plan."
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Use the exact words or adapt them to fit your style and situation
Say the words out loud to yourself before the real conversation
Adjust the language to match how you actually talk and feel
Remember: These scripts are starting points, not requirements. The most important thing is that you show up authentically, with care and honesty. The right person will appreciate you taking the time to have these conversations.
Learn the philosophy and strategies behind confident, healthy conversations
Comprehensive guide with conversation approaches, real examples, and how to handle different responses when discussing testing and sexual health with partners.
Read Guide →18+ conversation prompts and icebreakers for discussions about boundaries, consent, relationships, and sexuality. More open-ended than scripts.
Explore Starters →Learn how to bring up PrEP with partners. Includes conversation starters for serodiscordant couples, non-monogamous relationships, and monogamous pairs.
Read Article →Interactive tool to build your complete communication plan across the MATCH framework. Use scripts to structure conversations about all five pillars of sexual health.
Launch Tool →